I was born into this world with sickle cell. For those of you who don't know what that it, it is a blood disease where blood is more prone to not getting enough oxygen. When that happens, instead of being nice and round so it can travel through my veins and capillaries smoothly, it takes the shape of a sickle. This c shape is pointy and not so smooth and can get stuck while traveling. Which causes immense pain in the area where the clog happens.

I’ve been to the hospital more times than I can count. I've had transfusions, surgeries, and more doctors’ appointments than the average person. Compared to most other people with sickle cell, however, my hospital visits and number of transfusions are pretty low. I didn't have to miss out on school and other life events as much. Unless I tell you, you won't know that this is something that I go through.

When I was younger, I really hated getting hospitalized. It always made me feel weak, and vulnerable. But at the same time, it was also what showed me how much my parents, siblings, and friends cared about me. And those moments of care usually helped me a lot during the times when I was depressed. In its own way, it could fend off the “nobody cares about me” thoughts.

Sickle cell is not who I am, it's just something that happens to me. Even before I really started to know God, a pain crisis wasn't really something that I feared daily. I just worked to do what I need to do to keep it low; drink water, stay warm, rest often, take my meds etc. But I’m not super meticulous about the whole process. Some days I don’t take my medication, sometimes I push myself a little bit when doing rigorous activities, and sometimes I forget my jacket on a cool day.

I used to ask God often, why me? Why did I have to have this condition? Why do I have to deal with this? As I’ve gotten to know God, there are some verses that I take comfort in whenever these thoughts start to creep in; John 9:1-3 and 2 Corinthians 12: 8-10. Throughout my journey with Christ, I've grown even less fearful of getting a pain crisis than I used to be. I'm still learning what the word has to say about healing, and sickness, but I do know that the Spirit of Christ is what gives me life (Romans 8:10-11), not my blood.

When I accepted Christ, I was born again, I became a new creature (2 Corinthians 5:17). I may have been born into this world with sickle cell, but I was reborn in the spirit realm perfectly whole, lacking in nothing. I don't fear getting a pain crisis, I don't fear getting sick. Sure, I may still get symptoms, but it's nothing I can't overcome with God. Besides, to live is Christ and to die is gain (Philippians 1:21).

Infirmities are hard to deal with and everyone deals with them differently, but in all things, I know that God will bring me through it. Sickness doesn't rule me, Christ does, because greater is He that is in me, than he that is in the world (1 John 4:4).